My drawer full with emotional items
Glad that I called my super intelligent sister (does not want to show it to anyone) Bipasha.
She was telling me about our drawers full with emotional items as a metaphor that needs to be emptied out-if not, the tiniest item added to it can seem overwhelming.
Our electricity went off when she was sharing about handling each item of this emotional drawer individually with care one by one — accepting and forgiving them so that the items are discarded from the drawer with the justice it deserves!
I curiously wanted to do a quick check on my emotional drawer. It seems so full! I have a beautiful childhood where books were my friends. It started to get complicated with more people around in it.
I addressed my personal fears in ways that felt like I am solving the problem for others — often through volunteer activities, through personal support and random things that do not work most of the time (e.g., doing research that seems lame to everyone like this one ). Just to give a glimpse of what me and my siblings went through — I work with domestic abuse and violence survivors (the problem gets worse every day with more and more ways to hurt women and minorities), working to support women in science (the enthusiasm seems lower time to time among our girls) and from very far, I support a suicide helpline ( I still could not overcome my personal emotion to face it bravely), and still the pain persists. My works gave me a clear purpose but not enough courage to explore my own emotional state.
I hope to look at one item at a time this year. The events we faced appears to be public while the pain remains private. Maybe my drawer will not be entirely empty — I may have a torn-out T-shirt with an emotional bruise and faded memories; a sock without a pair that has untold secrets … hope to say good bye to some of them.
Thanks to all for accepting the imperfect version of me so far — love.
Wanted to add few resources here
- An emotional helpline, just want someone to listen to you: Kaan Pete Roi
- Legal Support, serious legal aid needed: Ain o Shalish Kendra (ASK)
- Support for programming, only for girls/women : Code it, Girl
- Support for women in Computing with Munir Hasan: Missing Daughters
- Love Mathematics? Bangladesh Mathematical Olympiad
- Want to change the world as a young Scientist? Global Young Academy
- Want to drop a line for nova? nova.ahmed@northsouth.edu :)
